debbie's story

As I think back about the challenges that I had 28 years ago with miscarriages I am shocked to realize
that it was only 6 – 8 months of my life, because at the time it felt like forever!

My husband had graduated from school the spring of 1984 and we were ready to start a family. That
summer, I felt like I was pregnant, but hadn’t yet seen a doctor. I started bleeding heavily and went to
the ER and did a pregnancy test and it was confirmed that I was indeed pregnant, but was miscarrying.

During that examination they discovered that I have what is known as a double uterus which puts a
dimple on the wall of the uterus and if the fetus implants itself there, it doesn’t get enough blood to
survive. It was somewhat comforting to know what the problem was – but that didn’t help me feel
better at that moment!

We waited the 3 months before getting pregnant again. Fortunately for me, I didn’t have difficulty
getting pregnant and was pregnant that autumn. I had a friend that was pregnant at the same time and
we were so excited!

As I was in my 3rd month of pregnancy, I started hemorrhaging. This miscarriage was quite traumatic for
me. I was far enough along in my pregnancy that it was very obvious when the fetus flowed out with
the blood and I required a blood transfusion and stayed a night in the hospital. Things happened so
fast for me at this point, that I wasn’t really aware of what was going on – this part was probably more
traumatic for my husband!

It was hard going back and telling people that I was no longer pregnant. I remember my mom and my
sister-in-law talking about what was going on and my niece being so confused that I had “lost my baby”
– how does someone do that?

I remember being very frustrated and emotional at this time. Others made having babies look so easy!

We waited another 3 months and I got pregnant and this pregnancy felt different. I knew that this one
was going to be full-term and delivered my first son in October of 1985. As my son got older, I teased
him that he just wasn’t ready to come down from Heaven and kept putting me off!

I didn’t have any further problems with miscarriages and went on to have four healthy babies. My
miscarriages did make me very grateful for the otherwise easy time I did have in getting pregnant and
having easy pregnancies.

I write this to give hope to those that are having difficulty in their quest to start or expand their families.
Life does bring challenges. For some people those challenges is not having children, for others it is
having children! Don’t allow the challenges of life absorb all of our energy and deprive us of the beauty
around us here on earth.


if you are interested in participating in this project, please email me at jackienorrisphoto @ gmail.com

To see more of the infertility and pregnancy loss project, click here. 

1 comment:

Stephanie said...

How sweet of Debbie to share her story and give another perspective to your project. She's so right - life has challenges and all we can do is overcome them.